Had a blazing row with Assembly cleaner, Edna Mopbucket this afternoon. She's always had this thing about 'celebrities'. I could never see what she saw in Michael Barrymore myself - but I accepted it. Anyway, today she went too far when she started talking about her 'lust' for Lib Dem MP, Lembit Opik. I tried to say that he was already taken, but she'd have none of it. Edna does a day a week cleaning down at Westminster, and mentioned that she's spending every spare minute going up and down in the lift, dressed like a pop star, with some chip paper in her hand, hoping to meet him. Reminds me of when I was young and single. I used to find out where the unmarried Bobbie Roberts was going out for a drink - so that I could coincidentally call by the same place. "Oh, fancy meeting you here!"
Now the reason behind Edna's bizarre behaviour is an incident she heard about from a reliable source in the House of Commons. I only heard about it yesterday at the Cameron do in Cardiff. Apparently, the Lib Dem MP for Montgomeryshire was recently sharing a lift with a young woman who was eating a packet of chips. He took out his pen, smiled in a friendly sort of way, scribbled his name on the chip paper and said something like "That should add some value to it for you". I told Edna that I thought it was one of the most insufferably arrogant acts I'd ever heard of - but she wouldn't have it. She is so blinded by 'celebrity' that she thought it "was a nice gesture". I told her that if she was going to carry on like this, she might as well pack up going to night school now - because with judgement like that she will be unemployable. I will certainly have to consider ending all the publicity I've been giving her.