Mistaken Identity

If you happen to be in North Wales and see the stooped figure of a ruddy cheeked farmer, trudging over the mountains, bent into an angry South Westerly, with a hessian sack over his shoulders, don't get over-excited. It is not a Kyffin Williams masterpiece come to life - or Sir Anthony Hopkins 'getting into the part' in preparation for a film about the great Ynys Mon artist, who died recently.It is much more likely to be Tory Assembly Member, Brynle Williams, out looking for ladybirds. The clue to look for is breed of dog. A black collie, its Sir Anthony - a Pembrokeshire corgi and its Brynle.

How do I know this , you may ask. Well, Brynle rang me in a right old sweat a few days ago. He and Mary have moved into a new bungalow on the farm and greenfly are playing havoc with Mary's roses. The man who almost single handedly brought Britain to its knees by orchestrating a fuel protest didn't know what to do. So he turned to his old friend - me. I told him that he could take the easy way out and buy some greenfly killer from the garden centre. But if he really wanted to be ecologically sound he should introduce into the garden some fast breeding ladybirds - which eat greenfly by the thousand. Not only would it be a cheaper (an important consideration for we Welsh hill sheep farmers) but its just the sort of thing to appeal to these Plaid Cymru and Lib Dem types that we're trying to butter up at the moment. Its just the sort of policy which could be suggested by the Tories in Wales to put the Rainbow Coalition back on track.